It’s a brand spanking new year….resolutions?
I’m not one of those people who believes in making New Year’s resolutions. If you aren’t resolved to doing things whenever they need to be done, you certainly won’t be any better at it just because the date on the calendar changes. I do, however, have plans in the works for a photo shoot to update my website. I recently acquired a “June Cleaver” style dress, for the true old-fashioned domestic discipline fans. I can’t wait to stage some scenes with a 50’s-60’s milieu.
Looking back to last year how has your spanking business been?
My spanking biz has been great. The people I’ve chosen to take on as new clients have turned out to be wonderful folks (with just the right amount of mischief and naughtiness in them) and many are becoming good friends. That’s the way I like to operate. It takes a little more of my time to screen and select the people I take on but it really pays off with a lot of long-lasting relationships.
My Spanking Life Coaching Services are really starting to expand. It’s rapidly becoming my favorite thing. My program has proven more effective for people than even I imagined it would be. I guess the threat of one my spankings has proven to be a persuasive motivational tool! It’s extremely satisfying to see people achieve—and often surpass—their objectives. Who cares that it takes a lot of threatening and some sore bottoms to get there. Hey, whatever works, right? I’m looking fwd to getting more naughty procrastinators on the right path.
So do you have more or less lap time available this year?
Since I limit the number of sessions I do to only 3 or 4 per week in order to keep things very unobtrusive and discreet on my home turf, my “Lap Time” seems to remain consistent from year to year. As long as people can be patient and plan for their visits at least a day or two in advance – and provided I feel they are sane, well-mannered folks – I can usually find time for everyone who wants to experience a well-spanked bare bottom in the manner of their choosing.
Is most of your business repeat or do you see new naughty bottoms mostly?
It’s probably about 50/50. A lot of newbies come in and a select few become repeaters. Everyone who calls me gets a generous amount of my time to get their questions and concerns handled before we both decide if we want to meet. I really want to understand what it is that keys someone in to the experience. Is It simply the CP? What is their level of tolerance? Is it being lectured? Being embarrassed? Being confronted in front a witness? Do they need a caring, nurturing kind of disciplinarian or a mean, strict one? Do they like rituals or buzz words? So many people think that by saying they like spanking they have said it all and I should know exactly what to do. If a Spanker doesn’t ask a ton more questions at that point, spankos are pretty at the mercy of pot luck! That’s why I invest the preliminary time with people. I think this does increase the likelihood that those who are selected are the right fit for me, which also ups the odds that I know exactly what to do with them. I believe this may be why a lot of first-timers become regulars.
What should the curious spankee know that will finally get him/her to see you (a professional)?
This is just common sense. The same behavior that will enable someone to find the right job, living accommodations, friends and lovers will serve in qualifying him or her to get in the door of a reputable professional disciplinarian.
Be prepared: think about what you’re looking for and prepare some questions. Be specific. Do not assume that every spanko likes what you like and wants what you want.
Be ready to answer questions openly and honestly. No worthwhile professional is going to accept random strangers into her personal space. When answering her questions, don’t just give yes or no answers. Explain what you mean with specificity, and volunteer whatever information you feel will enable her to give you a great session. That’s all any good domme is bothering to ask questions of you for.
Be polite, and be respect her time. Don’t indulge YOURSELF by rambling on with longwinded stories of your life or your spanking adventures, unless asked. Don’t start grilling her for a blow-by-blow description of what she will do with you if you should meet. This type of question is not appropriate until you have booked a session. That is the time to structure the session. Initially, just find out if she provides what you want to experience, and that she understands your personal needs and limits. Most dommes assume that anyone who then tries to keep her talking about the details of a session that has not yet been scheduled is just looking to pleasure himself over the phone. This will not get you in the door.
Be aware that most disciplinarians do not include sexual activities in a spanking session. That means you should not expect to be allowed to release in session. There’s nothing wrong with respectfully asking about this. Most spankos that I have met do not consider that sort of thing a part of discipline. But if you do, better you should find out if the lady you’re contacting will allow it. That way , if it’s something you require, you will not be shocked or upset when you get into the thick of things and then find out it’s not going to happen. Just make sure you inquire about this tastefully or you may not make a very good impression.
That works. I decide to see you. Explain your spanking style? I know it depends on me and my wants and desires, but if you had your way:
I think I’ve already addressed this when I stated that spanking tastes vary quite a bit. I will answer the question like this: What’s fun for me is the scenario whereby the naughty person is sent by the teacher or (if adult roleplay) the boss or wife, or is mandated for punishment by a court of law. In that case, I will be in character when I welcome into my home (which we pretend has been transformed into the Principals’ Office or the Human Resources Office or the prison matron’s office) and I sit them down. I confront them with their shortcomings and sometimes they like to play dumb. So we go round and round a bit, but I always find a way to convince them that they are caught dead to rights! Then I lower the boom and issue The Ulitmatum: they must be subjected to my rather unconventional form of payment for their “crimes” or be fired, expelled, incur a more severe prison sentence or, worst of all, I will tell their parents! Of course, we all end up conceding to the punishment and I march them into my little Spankatorium and deliver whatever kind of stern spanking and scolding we have pre-negotiated according to the client’s desires and level of tolerance. Please be clear this is only one variation on my style, and kind of sessions and scenarios that occur here. Hey, we’re making it up, so we can create whatever want together, right? But that one is a version I especially enjoy.
I’m sure everyone reacts differently while being spanked. How do you know you are giving the best possible spanking?
I know what you want to hear. You want tales of personas, scolding subjects, methods of applying implements, positions I might put someone in, but in all honesty, I work collaboratively with all my clients. I don’t really care what the individual details are that result in my getting to bend someone over and redden their behind. If a client doesn’t have ideas for their scenario I can certainly devise something on my own. I believe that the best kind of sessions are whatever we create together. I think that anyone attracted to spanking games has perused the internet, books, magazines and such and has been regaled with stories of young boys being taken to task by their nannies, and young men getting caught peeping by an attractive neighbor lady, or the unfortunate male who has been sent to the Disciplinary Consultant by his wife or girlfriend to correct his undesirable habits, etc., etc., etc. I don’t have to cover that ground again here. I just love to take over and confront the culprit with his or her shortcomings and watch them plead and squirm and try to avoid my stinging swats while their bare bottom turns redder and redder. It doesn’t matter what part I’m playing.
Do you usually draw tears?
Haha. Yes, there have been times when I’ve brought someone to tears. That being said, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard clients request that over the phone when we have our little get-acquainted interview about their session, but it takes more than just the idea of this to bring it into being.
I’ve spanked hundreds of bottoms over a dozen or so years and it’s been my experience that most grown men have a hard time letting themselves be vulnerable to the point where they can break down and shed tears when getting a butt tanning by a virtually total stranger. This usually is more likely to happen after we get to know one another over several sessions (and the feedback conversations afterward) and we are comfortable with one another. By then I have a much better idea of a clients emotional triggers, which are far more influential at pushing someone to the emotional places where tears come from than a hard thrashing. I have no problem applying a severe spanking, but without the emotional component, most men will toughen up and hold back.
I will say that I have been able to elicit tears from women clients far easier than just about all of the men. This may be because women are generally more emotionally available, or it could be because, being a woman myself, I have a better intuitive sense when working with them. If someone expresses that they have longed to know what it feels like to be spanked to tears I will bring all of my instinct and experience to bear to try and take us there, but no one can predict for sure how any person is going to react when in the moments of a spanking… even the person himself!
Can you handle squirming and kicking? Does it happen a lot?
I’m pretty good at manhandling kicking and squirming brats. Some people like to do this. And some can’t help themselves when they feel the sting of my very strong right arm especially if I’m holding a hairbrush. But I’m quite petite and, let’s face it, when push comes to shove (literally!) I’m not going to be able to overpower a big, strong man. So, when this type of thing is discussed in the phone interview I always let the client know that while I’m pretty capable of putting a naughty boy in his place, pulling his arm behind him or wrapping a leg over his thighs, etc., I’m not going to attempt to wrestle anyone to ground over it. We all have to suspend disbelief a little when engaging in spanking role play, and big, strong men have agree to take their physical skirmishes only so far!
How do you handle someone who tries to get off your lap? Or put a hand back?
I would begin by issuing a warning, letting the misbehaving party know that he will not be happy if he keeps acting up in this way. It will only bring him the opposite result that he is hoping for. By squirming away or trying to cover his behind he’s trying to avoid the sting of the swats. But if he can’t stop fighting me I have no choice but to punish him more harshly.
Usually, I have to grab the hand he’s trying to block my spanks with and pin it behind his back. Sometimes I will pull it forward and far from his bottom. And then he will receive even harder spanks. If I’m especially short-tempered that day I might just stand up, foisting him onto the floor, then go and get one of my more threatening straps or paddles, pin him down on the floor with my knee and really give his rear end a right hard thrashing until he promises to behave himself and take his spanking without putting me through such a fuss. These are some of things that have occurred with disagreeable brats of all (consenting) ages, but I generally work spontaneously so you never know know what I might do!
What have you learned most in all the years spanking naughty bottoms?
I could write a book on this one. (Oh yeah, I actually did that!) I guess in short I will say here that I have learned never to take anything for granted. People will surprise you. Sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse.
Also, I always treat everyone generously and with respect, but I have learned to be disciplined when giving of my time and attention. I want to spend time with those who inquire about my sessions and answer all their questions, get to know about them to make sure I am safe with them, and allow them to feel safe and comfortable about me. However, there are people out there whose only purpose is to amuse themselves at the expense of ladies such as myself. So I have learned that when I have covered all the relevant ground with someone and they keep pushing for more and more of my attention, I have to invite them to make an appointment if they want to continue the dialogue. I have found that people who truly intend to engage in a session understand this.
Is there anything else new to learn?
No matter what you do, there’s always more to learn. This is a people oriented business and when you’re dealing with people it’s guaranteed that, at some point, some of them are going to surprise you. You never know what that might elicit from you in the moment and you may discover something new you’ve never thought or done before, which can be exciting—and sometimes even scary. But with a proper preliminary screening the scary stuff should be very unlikely. Also, my clients have shown and taught me things many, many times over the years. People can be very clever and some have lots of ideas. Ideas that have never occurred to me. I love it when that happens!
Can you do anything special for clients who say “Andy sent me?”
If someone introduces himself to me as coming from a recommendation from Andy or someone connected with his websites I would be most happy to make special arrangements with that person. It could be a discount. It could be giving them a little extra time, or maybe seeing them on a day or time I do not normally conduct sessions. If it does come down to cost, I will try to do whatever I can to make a session possible for them.
Wishing you the best and hope you’ll update us often.