No, I don’t make resolute/difficult changes to my life just because it’s a specific day…I make difficult changes when I feel determined and strong enough.
What have you learned in the last year?
I learned to talk less and listen more.
I learned more about my craft.
I learned the truth about two terrible lies spread about the English: they are not stiff-lipped and their foods are delicious, not bland or boring.
You were one of my most viewed interviews.
Guess men love very strict women?
Yes, some men do, and I am so lucky and happy that they do! Before BDSM I perceived it as a negative character trait only…submissive men made me accept and embrace my domineering personality.
Maybe my rubberism intrigued some of your followers, perhaps it was my out-and-loudly-kink-proud-lifestyle for others. But then again, I have a large and mostly supportive family…could have been them who viewed it!
But it’s a misconception that all you do is merciless whipping. We shouldn’t be (too) scared to see you, right?
Thank you for asking this! It is a common misconception people have about me. It is true that the content I manufacture are nearly always ultra-hard impact play sessions, brutal canings and sjambokkings. I film ultra-hard canings for two reasons:
1. Personally, it is infinitely more difficult and technically challenging to perform, than soft canings. It requires of me to bring my practice to an advanced skill level and the successful execution of the clips often requires extensive pre-production planning.
2. There are millions of soft/sensual clips produced, less where the severity is at this level.
I’ll stop now, your original question was not about caning.
Thanks for the compliment.
Yes, professionally speaking, I am super satisfied, passionate about my craft and stimulated by it in so many ways. The type of BDSM I perform does help me to some extent with keeping in shape.
I am content romantically.
I am grateful to have friends whom I can trust, whom I love and to have a family I actually like.
Again, thanks for the compliment. Yes, in certain play situations/with certain players, it helps a lot if they’re devoted to you. They become more submissive and/or their devotion enables them to endure harsher punishment, especially in the kind of plays I often practice…with heavy impact play, some level of devotion helps some players to not only endure but actually enjoy the play.
The devotion is not one-sided, though. My sadism does not prevent me from feeling empathy, from caring about them or from enabling a mutually beneficial outcome to the play.
I will travel and tour extensively in 2018:
First up is a month-long trip to Scotland and different UK dungeons, very soon in fact – beginning February. four weeks.) I’m in Germany for a week this March and possibly in Australia for some weeks, though that is still being planned.
Yes, I did, it’s a great interview. We are friends and it effortlessly gels when we collaborate.
Something she won’t tell you (I would never reveal a secret)
Or maybe a little one… her Wi-Fi network name is a really ‘obscene’ word, she was hesitant to give it to me the first day when we met in person.
I do not compete professionally.
I admire their techniques and style and love watching their grace, while caning. I’m happy when I encounter their work or meet them in person, especially when I can also collaborate with them and cane side-by-side. But besides the pleasure and fun, it’s beneficial to me technically – I have learnt much from them, even though our techniques differ.
No. I collaborate with Dominatrices & Disciplinarians whom I admire and like, I’d rather have fun with them and be inspired by them than be competitive. There can be no winner, it’s not as if caning will be recognized as an Olympic item, now is it?! When I am confronted by a nasty Domme I merely move along and ignore. The women I choose to collaborate with are not like that and neither am I.
The sjambok can be a more severe implement, even more intense than the King Of CP implements – The Cane, Factors to consider are the type of material and its size. The types of sjamboks I like to use are heavy, leather sjamboks, often made from hippopotamus hide, traditionally African and fascinatingly unique, because of the quality of the leather. It looks and feels like amber, or golden resin. Technically I relish the challenge of wielding it and study it tirelessly.
For bottoms (especially those who are into impact play) it is usually very alike to receiving the cane in terms of endurance and mental strength, but a completely singular sensory surprise.
Bastinado is foot caning, applied in a variety of positions, almost always with the bottom restrained with rope or functional bondage (the feet curl inward with bastinado, so bondage is almost always essential.) A variety of implements can be used, but there are important safety considerations to comply with in terms of the material the implement is manufactured from and the specific dimensions. These should be taken very seriously.
Falaka is also foot caning, but with a specific difference: the feet are rendered flat and immobile with a Falaka stick, in the ancient Ottoman, traditional style. This way, it is possible to present the feet to the Top as a slightly flatter and more stable surface onto which the Top can apply pain. Describing different implements, ancient and modern, or the effect it has on the receiver, is not possible here.
Do you have a favorite?
1. Caning, absolutely.
Abso-fucken-lutely! I love it so much. BDSM breaks down barriers… personal, psychological and where it concerns prejudice. It creates acceptance of the self, of others and a healthy curiosity about the unknown. It often instills a desire to know if what societal norms / beliefs taught us to fear, might actually be a path to enlightenment, to pleasure, to knowledge. BDSM is the path by which practitioners often achieve this.
I sometimes perform humiliation role play if I feel comfortable with the bottom, if I know them well. Many types of humiliation role play are hard limits.
Physically, I do not perceive spanking positions as humiliating at all.
If I think of it practically, I perceive the bottom bent over, as assuming a necessary body posture in order to present the spanker with the body part they intend to punish.
If I think of it in a psychological way, I perceive the bottom as vulnerable rather than humiliated.
This is how I perceive it during BDSM play sessions.
Having received corporal punishment from my mother during my childhood was not beneficial, it was the opposite. It’s probably the main reason why I have such a strong aversion to experiment with most types of humiliation play.
I get sadistic pleasure, most of all. I am not into psychic games and such types of role play, personally.
My mom passed away three years ago. She knew though.
My dad knows, he is very supportive of me and my career and I send him my clips to view if he wishes to do so, because I value his opinion and I trust his judgment, when he gives me feedback, sometimes.
Sorry to hear that. How about other family members or friends who knew you before
My closest family members and the people I love most knew, including my husband, my sister and my parents. The only exception was my grandmother… Now, because of the very large age gap (she was 89 years old at that stage and our different belief systems, I thought I should not tell her. But I underestimated her…after someone pushed a newspaper article ‘outing’ me under her old age home cottage door while she was at church, she phoned me in tears, wanting to know who had hurt me as a child, in order to want to do “such things”. I fetched her for a two day visit the next morning and it took a six-hour conversation to explain BDSM in general to her, as well as my specifics. I showed my dungeon to her. She understood and the rest of the visit we crocheted and ate together, as usual. About a month later, during her next sleepover visit, she asked a few more questions about it and to see one of my videos. She watched two clips, then said thank you, she has seen enough, she understood what I did. Ever since then, it was ok. These days she won’t ask about it specifically or in detail, but I needn’t hide it. After this any desire to be accepted into the bosom of society was burned out of me. I didn’t care about it at all any longer. My biggest nightmare became a reality, yet I still had the love and respect of those I loved.
So, I don’t give a fuck any more. I can talk about anything, about personal experiences, family matters, about personal pain or pleasure, anything if I wish to and the freedom from caring about what anyone reading this might think of it, is wonderful. I was forced into changing so that I could be this way, and now I can appreciate it.
I prefer it this way, despite the terrible manner in which it happened.
• A client tried to convert me to religion mid-session once. During his judicial caning. He probably went onto my Facebook profile before his appointment and decided to try — he steered the conversation that way deliberately and refused to leave after his session until I agreed to take and watch the stack of religious DVDs in his car boot.
• A woman commenting underneath a trailer posted on FB of my first belting clip trailer: “I’m sorry if this offends you, but I watched this and to be honest, I did not enjoy it, it’s not sexy at all.”
• My grandmother’s shock & horror when she asked me what neighbors were doing (Wife in fetish gear flogging & pegging husband in leather harness) in the movie ‘Everything Must Go,’ when we watched it randomly one evening. Afterwards, we were sure she looked at us funny, certain that we dirtied our marriage by also performing it, even though we denied it when she asked directly. Her capacity to digest all of what BDSM might mean only stretched so far, but it was more funny than judgmental.
• The client who visited me once, mainly out of vanilla need for excitement rather than BDSM interest, contacted me a month later and wanted to pay me my session fee to have dinner with him and “save me from being forced to do what I do”.
• Some of the confessions I hear of people’s criminal / sexual / strange escapades, are more interesting than any movie plot, ever.
• Before I was outed, I opened the gate and front door remotely for ‘Jacques’ at the intercom mid spanking in my living room. I thought it was hubby Jacques (he went to the shops while I played, and I expected him back by then). Instead it was a dear friend also named Jacques who swung by for a quick drink, accompanied by a friend of his who I did not know. They walked in on the scene. A naked man restrained in our living room, me with CP implement in hand. It was hilarious, all of us equally shocked.
• The Egyptian fan who wanted to travel to me in SA for a Falaka session. Near the date of his flight, he gingerly asked if it would be OK for me to punish a woman also during his session? Yes. Even if it is his wife? Yes. Thanks, you might want to be informed that she is pregnant but it’s less than 3 months? Yes. A few minutes later his mother in law insisted upon accompanying them and receiving it from me as well in the same session.
I’m not sure to this day whether he was pulling my leg or if it was real.